Chelsea Crockett

JESUS | BEAUTY | LIFESTYLE | FASHION

Tag: friendship advice

You Can’t Change People, But God Can

Odds are, you have someone in your life who really needs to change. They have an anger problem, a sin problem, an addiction problem, an attitude problem, or maybe even…

Odds are, you have someone in your life who really needs to change. They have an anger problem, a sin problem, an addiction problem, an attitude problem, or maybe even a denial problem. And you don’t know how to help them overcome their struggle or the sin that has held them down for so long. Fed up, tired, and hopeless because you have tried and tried, but somehow nothing has changed. You come to grips with the fact that they may never change, and that they may always be the way they are. I mean, what are you supposed to do in a situation like that?

Lucky for us, the Bible gives us wisdom on how to actually help a person change. So, how can you help a person change?

Pray repeatedly. Somehow we get this unbiblical idea in our heads that we can change people and by the force of our sheer will, we can make a person turn from their ungodliness to godliness. Scripture says differently. James 1:19-10 says “Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.” The hard truth is that we cannot cause a person to change, no matter how hard we try. Only God can soften their heart and open their ears. The best thing we can do for a person is pray for them, and not in a “God please change this person because they are driving me crazy” kind of way, but in a “God please change this person for their good and your glory” kind of way. Pray for them constantly. Pray that God would bless them, give them joy, and give them victory over their sin. Also, instead of criticizing the person you want to change, pray for them. For every one time you criticize, pray ten times!

Encourage them often. This may sound counterproductive because if I encourage them, they will think everthing is okay, right? That isnt how it works. The authors of the Bible made this evident. Before they brought any criticism, they always began with encouragement. The way Paul responded to the Corinthians is a great example of this. The Corinthian church was going nuts. They were all engaging in sexual immorality, worshiping other Gods, making idols, and many other sinful things. But, Paul began his letter to the Corinthians by telling them how grateful he was for them. “I give thanks to my God always for you..” are his words exactly. Do you want to help a person change? Give thanks to God for them. Encourage them and point out areas where you see God at work in their life. Don’t fixate on their weaknesses and miss all the good things God is doing in them.

Correct them lovingly. There is a time for correction, but that correction should be when necessary. 1 Thessalonians 5:14 says “And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all.” Sometimes our corrections can take the form of admonishment or rebuke. Sometimes they can take the form of helping someone in their weakness. But always correct with patience and love, not anger and frustration.

So, how do we help people truly change? Pray, encourage, correct, and repeat. Don’t try and make people change, persistently pray for them and let God do the changing.

XOXO, Chels

 

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Life Lessons from Proverbs 11:27

“Whoever seeks good finds favor, but evil comes to one who searches for it.” That’s what Proverbs 11:27 tells us. In a nutshell, it means that anyone can find the…

“Whoever seeks good finds favor, but evil comes to one who searches for it.” That’s what Proverbs 11:27 tells us. In a nutshell, it means that anyone can find the dirt in someone, but we should strive to be the ones who find the gold.

It can be easy to focus on the negative in people and point out their flaws to make ourselves feel like we are better than them. That’s something anyone can do. Anyone can focus on the negative in someone. It takes a humble mind to think of the good in others most of the time. It is so much healthier for our minds and our hearts to be positive. Our outlook on life depends on it! Also, when we start talking positive about people behind their backs instead of negative, people start to notice. Be an example for others and make them wonder why you are different. Let Jesus shine through you.

Be the one who finds the gold.

XOXO, Chels

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Life Lessons from Proverbs 24:11

Proverbs 24:11 says “A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back.” I love the wisdom in this verse. It tells us a lot a lot…

Proverbs 24:11 says “A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back.” I love the wisdom in this verse. It tells us a lot a lot about how we should strive to act and carry ourselves.

I will be the first to admit that it is easy to react emotionally and based on feelings in tricky situations. When we are having a confrontation or are on bad terms with a friend, it can be easy to vent our feelings. Those words could cause hurt, and once you say something you can’t take it back. That’s why this verse says that a wise person holds their feelings back. Words hurt, and they can ruin relationships. Take some time to cool off and step back to look at the situation. Don’t act on impulse.

I know it is hard not to react in the moment, but holding those feelings back will be the best choice in the long run! It will save you, and others, a lot of hurt feelings and misunderstanding.

XOXO, Chels

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5 Ways to Be More Friendly

In my honest opinion, I think we should all be friendlier on a daily basis. Think of how many people’s day we could make, just by smiling at them or…

In my honest opinion, I think we should all be friendlier on a daily basis. Think of how many people’s day we could make, just by smiling at them or being sweet to them? These days friendliness can be misinterpreted as flirting or being “fake.” I find that completely sad, because friendliness is such a great quality to have! It makes your life better, it makes other people’s lives better. Here is how to be more friendly so you can make someone’s day every day.

  1. Smile at people you see: When you are walking down the street, smile at people! Don’t stare blankly ahead and avoid eye contact, smile! Be that person who makes eye contact and smiles, you will be the most friendly, likable person on the block!
  2. Be aware of body language: You can be a super sweet person, but if your body language is bad you can come off as not-so-nice. Are you sending off good vibes by making eye contact and smiling? Do you appear closed-off and unapproachable? Watch for those things!
  3. Give genuine compliments: A real, honest to goodness compliment is one of the nicest things you can give a person. People know when you are giving a real compliment or a transparent one. Compliment people on their best qualities and speak up when you notice something good about them or find they did something well! People like to be around people like that.
  4. Make people feel comfortable: If you are at a party or an event with friends and you see someone you are acquainted with looking like they feel uncomfortable, invite them over to sit with you or include them in conversation. This goes for people who don’t have anywhere to sit at lunch or a person who doesn’t have a group for a group project. Make people feel like they belong!

Like I said earlier, being friendly can sometimes be taken the wrong way by some people, but to others it is much appreciated. By simply making yourself more approachable you can improve people’s day and brighten your mood! Try friendliness out, it looks good on you!

XOXO, Chels

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Small Ways to Show You Care

Our culture is so fast paced and dominated by technology. With all of the distractions around is, it can be easy to forget how important it is to show people…

Our culture is so fast paced and dominated by technology. With all of the distractions around is, it can be easy to forget how important it is to show people we are thinking about them, we love them, and we care about them. How long has it been since you told your best friend you were thinking about her? If you don’t see her every day, it can be easy to forget to remind her how much she means to you. Same goes to your sister or your boyfriend. Here are a few ways to let the people you care about know, well, that you care about them!

  1. Handwritten notes: Knowing that you spent the time to hand write them a letter will warm their heart. Handwriting someone you love a letter is even shown to decrease YOUR stress and improve your mood! Everyone loves getting a “love note.”
  2. Remembering the little details: Does your bff have a test on Tuesday? Text her that morning and wish her luck! Does your boyfriend have a big baseball game coming up? Text him before and let him know you are rooting for him. You can even show up to the game with his favorite snack and give it to him after the game. He will be so impressed you remembered what his favorite candy bar is and thought to bring it to him! Remembering the details shows how much you care.
  3. Random surprises: Out of the blue gifts are so fun to receive because you had no clue it was coming, and it can totally brighten your day! Doing random acts of kindness is not only great for others, but it is good for you as well because it increases your mood! Surprise your sister with flowers today and watch her face light up.

 

What gestures make YOU feel loved?

XOXO, Chels

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How to Take Great Group Photos

Prom and graduation are here, and with both comes one thing…. group pictures! We have all had that awkward group-photo experience where everyone is confused about what they are supposed…

Prom and graduation are here, and with both comes one thing…. group pictures! We have all had that awkward group-photo experience where everyone is confused about what they are supposed to be doing with their hands, if they should be squatting or standing, and “guys, are we smiling or are we being serious?” Here are a few tips on how to look fierce in every group pic.

  1. Get in sync: Not Insync, like the band, in sync like as in the same pose! One of the keys to a good group is to make sure you are all on the same page pose wise.
  2. Keep up the candids: I looooove candid pictures. They let your personality shine through! Just because it is graduation doesn’t mean you have to stand stiff and serious! Throw your hat, have a laugh, and hug your friends.
  3. Squat it out: Once you have mastered the “squad squat” you will never have trouble taking group pics again. When you need to fit a bunch of buds into one pic, file into a few rows, then squat your tush down.
  4. Pop a knee: An easy way to add some sass and attitude to a group pic is to do a little pop of the knee. A knee pop can actually help fit more people into the pic if you are standing diagonally!

Now go rock those group photos!

XOXO, Chels

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How to Beat the Mid-Semester Slump

I hear my friends saying “How many more days until school is over?” and I bet you do too. But who can blame them? It is almost half way through…

I hear my friends saying “How many more days until school is over?” and I bet you do too. But who can blame them? It is almost half way through the second semester of the school year, and this is what I like to call the “mid-term slump.” It is the part of the year where you feel like you have been in school forevvver and your motivation is seriously lacking. It can even be a bit depressing. Don’t let the slump rule your life, take control! Here are a few ways to overcome it.

  1. Find what isn’t working and change it: If your grades or slipping or you feel like you are losing connection with some of your friends, make a change! Change the way you study, and change the way you stay in touch and stay close to your friends.
  2. Take care of yo-self: When your mind is in 20 different places and when you aren’t feeling motivated, it is easy to put taking care of yourself on the back burner. Don’t do that! Take care of yourself emotionally by writing in a journal or talking to a friend, and take care of yourself physically by taking a study or work break and going on a walk or working out. Keep yourself healthy and feeling good, it will help keep you out of the slump!
  3. Talk to a friend: Let them know how you are feeling. Odds are, they are feeling slump-ish too! Talking about it can help, and you can both try and come up with ways to stay motivated!
  4. Realize it will be over soon: Summer will be here before you know it, I promise. Counting down can sometimes make the time seem like it goes by slower. Quit crossing off the days and just enjoy the moment! These are some of the best days of our lives, so make them count!

Stay far from the slump, you will thank yourself in the long run!

XOXO, Chels

 

 

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Thoughtful Gifts For Your Long Distance BFF

Friendship is the best thing ever. BFFs are God’s gift to you. So you know what is the absolute worst? When your best friend moves away. Or when you move…

Friendship is the best thing ever. BFFs are God’s gift to you. So you know what is the absolute worst? When your best friend moves away. Or when you move away from your best friend! It is like there is a hole in your heart. College and growing up can send you to opposite sides of the country or even the world. Here are 3 sweet gifts for you and your bff to make the distance feel more manageable.

  1. State necklaces: Give your bff a necklace with your states on them! The sweet charms are an adorable reminder of your home and hers, and how you hold each other close to your hearts! Find them HERE
  2. Pretty pillows: Give her an adorable pillow like this one to remind her of you! She will think of you every time she sees it. There is a heart in the place where you live connected to a heart where she lives, reminding you that, no matter how far apart you are, your heart is with her. Find them HERE.
  3. Cute coffee mugs: Who doesn’t love a cute coffee mug? This pair of mugs is the perfect gift for a long distance BFF. Buy them HERE.

Remember, true friendship isn’t about being inseparable. It is about being separated and having nothing change. Just because you are far apart doesn’t mean your friendship has to be!

XOXO, Chels

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Sweet and Easy Bff Valentine’s Day Gifts

Even if you don’t have a boyfriend this Valentine’s Day, you can still show your bff’s some love! This “love day,” show the gals that have always been there for…

Even if you don’t have a boyfriend this Valentine’s Day, you can still show your bff’s some love! This “love day,” show the gals that have always been there for you how much they mean to you with simple gifts that say “you’re important to me.” Here are some inexpensive and thoughtful gifts for your gals.

  1. Gummy bears: Gummy bears are a fun and yummy treat, and add a “life is un-bearable without you” note to the bag and you have a cute and easy gift!gummy bears
  2. Lifesavers: I love Lifesaver candies. Fill a mason jar with Lifesavers and tie a ribbon around the top. Attach a note that says “You are a Lifesaver. Thanks for being a great friend!”lifesaver
  3. Red or pink nail polish: Give a gift that keeps on giving! Nail polish is something that your gals can use over and over again, so get them a red or pink for Valentine’s Day!nail polish (2)
  4. A customized mix tape: Nothing shows you care more than a customized mix tape! Put all of the songs that make you think of them, songs you both love or have rocked out to in the past, songs that were “your songs,” or just songs that you think they would like!

Happy Valentines Day to you and your gal pals.

XOXO, Chels

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Tips on Forgiving and Moving On

Carrying around resentment and anger is so unhealthy. It is hard to forgive someone who did you wrong, but forgiveness is a powerful thing. Forgiveness is accepting what happened, acknowledging…

Carrying around resentment and anger is so unhealthy. It is hard to forgive someone who did you wrong, but forgiveness is a powerful thing. Forgiveness is accepting what happened, acknowledging your feelings, and then letting them go. Forgiveness isn’t just for the person who hurt you, it for yourself too. Here is how you know you are ready to forgive and how to do it when the time is right.

  1. Forgive yourself and let go: Give yourself time to release all of the emotions you are feeling and recognize when you are ready. Next, understand that it is ok to feel shame or embarrassment or shame because of what happened. Then forgive yourself. Realize we all make mistakes and that no one is perfect.
  2. Talk it out: It doesn’t have to be out loud. Talk through the whole thing in your head. And next time you see the person who hurt you, you don’t have to verbally say “I forgive you” because that may just be plain awkward. You can show them you have forgiven them by your actions instead. But then again, sometimes it is good to verbally talk things through. It may make you feel better if you are able to communicate your hurt to the person but at the same time let them know you have moved past it. It really depends on you and the situation!
  3. Know the boundaries: Forgiving the person doesn’t mean things are going back to the way they used to be. That may take time, or it may never happen. Setting boundaries like limiting the amount of time you spend with that person, or avoiding certain situations that you know could be trouble is wise. Avoid falling back into the cycle that caused the hurt and know how to avoid it.

Forgiving someone takes a lot of humility and it takes a strong person. It isn’t easy, but it is so worth it.

XOXO, Chels

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Ways to Pray For Your Friends

Prayer is a powerful thing. Having a solid prayer life is essential in strengthening your faith, and it can get you through the toughest of times. I must confess, when…

Prayer is a powerful thing. Having a solid prayer life is essential in strengthening your faith, and it can get you through the toughest of times. I must confess, when life gets hard I have no problem praying for what I want and need, but when my friends are going through tough times I’m not as good about it! The best thing you can do for your friends is pray for them. Here are 4 prayers for your friends and mine.

  1. Jeremiah 17:7-8:Ask that the Lord would bless your friend as she trusts in the Lord. Pray that she would be like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots strong and deep by the stream, and has no need to fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit. Pray that God would make your friend strong, fruitful, and flourishing for His glory.FullSizeRender (84)
  2. Numbers 6:24-26: Pray that the Lord bless your friend and keep her; that He would make his face to shine upon her and be gracious to her; that the Lord would lift up His countenance upon her and give her peace.
  3. Proverbs 3:3-8: Pray that she would trust in the lord with all her heart and not lean on her own understanding. Ask that in all her ways she would acknowledge God, and God will make straight your friend’s path. Entreat the Lord to help your friend not be wise in her own eyes, but to fear the Lord, and turn away from evil.
  4. Psalm 138:7-8: Ask that when your friend walks in the midst of trouble, God would preserve her life. Claim His promise to stretch out His hand against the wrath of your friend’s enemies, to deliver her with His right hand. Remind God of His commitment to fulfill His purpose for your friend, and of His steadfast and endless love for her.

I hope my friends pray these prayers over me from time to time as well. What an encouragement to know that someone cares about you enough to lift you up in prayer!

XOXO, Chels

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3 Things That Make You a Bad Friend

I have heard way too many girls say that they don’t have many girl friends because “There’s too much drama” or “Too much judgement.” Our society tries to pit females…

I have heard way too many girls say that they don’t have many girl friends because “There’s too much drama” or “Too much judgement.” Our society tries to pit females against each other and dramatizes female conflict and makes everything seem like it is one big competition, when really we should be on the same team and working with each other to be better friends. I don’t doubt for one minute that you are a great friend who supports your gal pals, but like I said, we live in a world where it is often easy and sometimes encouraged to be a bad friend. Here are a few things you may not be aware you are doing, but they can be making you a bad friend.

  1. Jealousy: it can be difficult not to feel jealous when you see your bff getting her dream job, taking an incredible trip, or gaining huge achievements. But, nothing good comes from playing the
    comparison game. It just brings you down and makes you feel inadequate. It can also make your friend upset if you aren’t happy for her and her successes. Be happy for her achievements! It will make your life much more joyful, and she will be more likely to celebrate yours.FullSizeRender (79)
  2. You see her has competition: There are always going to be women that are more successful than you. Instead of making it feel like life is a competition and comparing yourself to them, take pride in what YOU have accomplished. You are also an amazing person, and are doing incredible things, so take pride in that. Not everything has to be a competition!
  3. You tend to judge her: If your friends do things you don’t agree with or approve of, let them know how their actions make you feel. Share your thoughts and feelings with them in a respectful manner instead of letting your judgements cloud your view of them. When they hear the way you feel, they will be able to respect your opinions.

Be supportive, caring, kind and a team player. That’s the key to being a great friend!

XOXO, Chels

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Be Kind, Even On Your Bad Days

Right now is a tense time for our country and our world. People are angry, hurt, confused, fed up, and because of these emotions their attitudes can become tainted. I…

Right now is a tense time for our country and our world. People are angry, hurt, confused, fed up, and 24f4701439373f95b9631f4a8a6d7bd5because of these emotions their attitudes can become tainted. I have witnessed how nasty people can become with their words and actions through the news and on social media, and I have a reminder for all of you out there: even if we disagree about everything, we can still be kind to each other.

Kindness is a courtesy we should all show each other. Being kind is so important during these times. Kindness can mean more to someone than you know. They may be having a terrible day, and your kind word or actions can change their whole outlook. Also, as a Christian, I find that my kindness acts as a witness of my faith. People notice when you are kind, and they ask how you can be that way even when it would be so much easier to be mean or rude. Jesus called us to be kind and be a witness to the world of His love.

Be kind, even on your bad days. You never know who may be watching you and may be impacted by your actions.

XOXO, Chels

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Why You (And I) Should Learn to Take a Compliment

Recently I have noticed something. Something that has really started to bother me. It is the fact that, as girls, we no longer know how to give and take compliments….

Recently I have noticed something. Something that has really started to bother me. It is the fact that, as girls, we no longer know how to give and take compliments. Why is this?

One of my philosophies is that we feel like we are being self-centered or “proud” when we take a compliment. When you are told a compliment, do you shrug it off? Why do we feel like we cannot believe the positive things other people tell us? Imagine if you accepted all of the compliments that are given to you instead of shrugging them off and trying to contradict them. How much would that change your self-confidence? Believing the positive things people tell us can be such a boost! We need to learn to see the good in ourselves that others see in us.fullsizerender-65

Now for my philosophy on why we sometimes have a hard time giving compliments. This, to me, goes hand in hand with the reason we don’t take compliments as well as we should. We don’t know how the other person will react to our praise, whether they will shrug it off or accept it. I think, as girls, sometimes we can let the jealousy bug bite us. We can think that by giving another girl a compliment, we are setting them above ourselves and making them look better than we do. WRONG. Giving someone else a compliment is the simplest, but most impactful thing you can do for them! Compliments are free to give, and they can make someone’s day SO much better!

Moral of the story? Give sincere compliments, and learn to take them in return. Accept people’s praise, because you are worth their affirmation! Don’t think that by accepting a compliment you are being self-righteous or prideful. Learn to confidently accept people’s admiration with a kind smile, and understand that you deserve it. We also need to know the importance of GIVING complements. They can honestly make someone’s day. How great is it knowing you can take someone’s mood and flip it around, just by telling them that you like their outfit? It is so easy to do, so why not humble yourself and give out a compliment or two?

XOXO, Chels

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Your Guide to Hosting Friendsgiving

What is the one thing that is almost as good as Thanksgiving with your family? Friendsgiving of course! As we get older, we start making traditions of our own, and…

What is the one thing that is almost as good as Thanksgiving with your family? Friendsgiving of course! As we get older, we start making traditions of our own, and one of my favorite new traditions is having a Thanksgiving with my friends, or “Friendsgiving.” Here are a few tips on how to host the best Friendsgiving ever.

  1. You make the main course, they do the rest: As the host of the party, you are in charge of the main parts of the meal such as the turkey, stuffing, and pumpkin pie. But the rest of the meal should involve your friends! Have them bring their favorite side dish or appetizer.this-aint-your-mommas-thanksgiving-happy-friendsgiving-7d42b
  2. Go all out DIY: No need for fancy decorations or décor, make your own place mats out of brown craft paper and other cute decorations with tissue paper and jars.
  3. Mason jars galore: Speaking of jars, use them as cups! You can even tie little bows around the necks of the glasses to make them a little more festive.
  4. Set the mood: Having the right background music playing gets the party going. Some good tunes playing low enough for people to hear them but soft enough for people to be able to hear their conversations can really set a relaxed but joyful mood.
  5. Send home the leftovers: Buy some to-go boxes and after the night is over, send leftovers home with your guests! College students love leftovers!! Especially Thanksgiving leftovers.

Happy Friendsgiving!

XOXO, Chels

 

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Life Lessons From 1 Thessalonians 5:11

To me, one of the best things you can do for your friends and family to show them you love them and care for them is to build them up….

To me, one of the best things you can do for your friends and family to show them you love them and care for them is to build them up. 1 Thessalonians 5:11 says “Encourage each other and build each other up.”1-thesselonians

This is such an important thing to have in life – people who will build you up and encourage you. And it is an important personality trait for us to have ourselves. People like to be around people who are positive and make them feel good about themselves and supported. Life is so much better when you feel like you have a support system and people that believe in you and encourage you to be successful. Be that person for someone else. Be that person that builds others up and encourages them. People will be drawn to you and will want to be around you! It is so energizing to be around positive people.

I have been trying to share tons of encouragement over my social media to try and encourage and build YOU all up. I want to be that person for you, and I pray that you would be that person for someone else.

XOXO, Chels

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